This is Star. You have probably seen her around my FaceBook page. Love my Star!
Before you freak out and get all concerned…she is fine! This picture was taken last summer. She had an anxiety attack out in the heat and had to hole up in an oxygen tank for a little while.
It was REALLY scary!
But all is well.
Isn’t that how life happens. We have experiences that make us hole up in safety, in fear for our life. Then we get stuck there. It feels safe, so, we don’t want to leave. But we can’t deny the fact that it is fear that is keeping us there.
Fear gets you stuck …. AND …. Fear keeps you there.
Sometimes I wish I could be more like Star. Once this past…she was great. She got right out of her “stuck-ness” and continued on, as if nothing happened.
What is keeping you stuck?
Stuck-ness happens when we don’t know what step to take next. Whether it is diet related, health related, relationships, business, finances, it all boils down to fear.
I let fear RULE my life for many years…. It is hard to live IN JOY when fear is a part of every fiber of your being.
What is fear?
False Evidence Appearing Real? We make up stories and then live as if they are true. We bring them to life…. for some reason…(human flaw)… this makes us more comfortable. BECAUSE then we know the outcome. No fault can be fall us when we are “right”.
Comfortable. That is a strange word when it is in correlation with FEAR. How can we continue to live in Comfortable Fear? They are opposites and yet we live them together, day in and day out.
I want AND desire to live Comfortable Peace; with food, my body relationship, the relationship I have with myself, my familial relations, my friends, my business, my finances.
How do we make this change? This shift? I think that is the most important question.
AWARENESS is the answer.
Fear is living in a future that doesn’t exist. Awareness is living in the present.
Let’s apply this to over-eating. That is a very common struggle among the women and men that I work with.
Over-eating evolves from tight control or lack of control, it is really a fear that I won’t be able to stop eating. “I’ve got to have the whole thing…it tastes so good and I may not have the opportunity to eat it again any time soon.”
It is also the fear of being present…not wanting to acknowledge that you are eating so you don’t have to “count” it as eating.
You are exactly right…. The physical body or more specifically the digestive system doesn’t know food is being eaten when you are CHECKED OUT. Food isn’t registered by the head brain OR the gut brain. Overeating, a belly ache, and increased body weight are the results.
The typical response to this is a sense of failure and “why even try” attitude (Comfortable Fear)
That is a lie. We tell ourselves a lie because we are IN fear. Fear that “what if we are right” “What if I can NEVER stop eating too much, what if I go on a diet to only gain it back, What if, What if, What if.” We could “what if” ourselves to death. We might as well go ahead and admit it, right?
What if we applied this same line of thinking with relationships. What is keeping you stuck in your relationships? Fear of being accepted for who you really are? For standing in confidence on an important issue when others look at you like you are crazy? So you withdraw and turn inward for self-preservation? Which keeps you alone. And proves you right (Comfortable Fear).
So why get out there and pursue a healthy relationship with food or people? Comfortable Fear is …. comfortable…. safe…. easy…. and sad to say but USEFUL.
It provides the excuse of WHY maintaining a healthy body weight is unsuccessful, or WHY nourishing friendships or business or finances are stunted in growth.
Comfortable Fear is something we CREATE and utilize to keep us from living the life we were intended to live in a body we love…. because Comfortable Peace is too hard…it requires too much.
So, let me ask the question again:
What is keeping you stuck?
I’m going to be honest and in “in your face” for a moment.
You and the Comfortable Fear YOU CREATE. DO you LIKE it? Do you like living this way?
Is it giving you EXACTLY what you have dreamed of?
So, what is it going to be?
Do you want to CREATE a lovely life living in a lovely body?
Then CHOOSE Comfortable Peace.
Comfortable Peace is:
Standing firm in your own footprint
Operating with ease and grace – with the choices you make around food, your body and your life.
Appreciating your OWN uniqueness
Believing in WHO you are and what you provide to this world
Living in a state of gratitude…with EVERYTHING – even the challenges – There is a valuable message in all experiences.
Living in AWARENESS – being present in the here and now.
BE-ing in alignment with your Truth
You know what to do next. You simply take the next step into Comfortable Peace.
Because Comfortable Fear hasn’t brought life’s desires to you. Why not try something new?
Ashly Torian is an expert in the fields of eating psychology, mind body nutrition and fitness. She serves women and men that struggle with food and body issues. She holds the key that unlocks the cage and opens the doorway to freedom from these struggles so they never have to experience them again.